Okay, so I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. Well, here goes:I told Cele tonight that I don't think it is fair to me nor to Lucía (his woman in Mexico), that she does not know about me and him.
I told him flat out...well here's out our convo went. We just hung up. (Before telling him all this I prayed to God to give me the strength to find the right words to tell Cele)
Cele: "How are you feeling? Are you feeling any better?"
Me: "A little better, more or less."
Cele: "Why?"
Me: *Being a chicken* "I don't know."
Me: *Not being a chicken anymore and telling him exactly how I feel* "There are a lot of things going through my head right now."
Cele: "Like what?"
Me: "Things about us."
Cele: *His voice gets serious and sounds kind of worried* "Things about us? What kinds of things?"
Me: "Well, I just don't think it is fair to me that my husband knows about you and me and that your woman in Mexico, Lucía, does not know about you and me. I don't think it is fair to me nor to her."
Cele: "Uh huh."
Me: "You need to tell her. Ese tipo en Honduras already knows about you and me, I told him the second month we were together. He knows that I don't want to be with him. He knows that I want to be with you. But Lucía knows nada about us. She still thinks that you want to be with her and that you are only with her."
Cele: "But I already told you that I am going to tell her when I go to Mexico. I need to do it in person."
Me: "Why?"
Cele: "Because."
Me: "But why? I told my husband about you over the phone. It is going to take you a LOT of money to save up to go back to Mexico, you know it is. You won't be going back for a year or so!"
Cele: But you told me that you'd wait for me those two months that I will be gone."
Me: "Yes, and when you go, of course I will wait for you. BUT you need to tell Lucía about us and not wait a year or more to do it. You need to tell her now."
Cele: "Maybe what you are really saying is that you don't want to continue our relationship? You don't want to be with me anymore?"
Me: "I never said that. I do want to continue this relationship with you and I do still want to be with you. But you need to tell her. She still thinks that you are with her and only her. But really you are with me and her! You have two girlfriends!"
Cele: "Yes, you are right."
Me: "Yeah, and I think it is better if you tell her now than tell her much later on (like a year or so or more) and make her think that you are with her and only her. It's not fair to me and it's not fair to her."
Cele: "This is all my fault."
Me: "What is your fault?"
Cele: "It's all my fault that I fell in love with you."
Me: "It's not your fault. It just happened."
Cele: *silence*
Me: "For example, what if my husband didn't know about you and me? What if I was talking to him almost every day and he still thought we were together? I don't think you would like that very much, would you?"
Cele: "No, I wouldn't. You are right."
Me: "And what if for an example I get pregnant? That is just another thing to worry about!"
Me: "Or maybe you aren't going to tell her because you aren't sure yet if you really want to be with me or not?"
Cele: "I already told you. I want to be with you and stay with you. I already told you that she doesn't love me."
Me: "Welllll, then IF she doesn't love you like you say she doesn't, well then it should be NO problem telling her that you want to be with me."
*silence between the both of us*
Cele: "So what do you think?"
Me: "I think that you need to tell her."
There is a bunch of silence and I hear him crying and I'm crying a little bit and then he asks if I am mad. He always asks that. I told him "No" just that he needs to tell her.
More silence and then I hear him rummaging through some things, have NO idea what. And then there are a few sighs and more silence. Then he tells me:
Cele: "Can you call me later?"
Me: "Yeah."
Cele: "Adios."
Me: "Adios."
Click.
That was the end of our convo. So Blogger buddies, whatcha think? Think he'll tell her? I don't think he will. ¿Quien really sabe?
All I know is that I ALSO told him that if he loves me and adores me like he says he does, that he will tell her. There should be no problem.
7 comments:
I agree with you that if it is no big deal to him and she doesnt love him , then there shouldnt be a problem with him telling her. She might also want to move on with her life over the course of a year. That would be the honest and fair thing for Cele to do. Im proud of you for standing firm and asking for the respect you deserve. Age isnt a big deal , but honesty is . Hope this all works out for you
Thanks for agreeing, I mean it ONLY makes sense, right?
I already told him an example last night. If he was in Mexico and I was here in the US, and he was waiting on me back in Mexico and we were talking almost everyday and he thought I was ONLY with him...BUT I met someone else and fallen for them. Is it fair for HIM not to know about it?
He told me he got me. Well he BETTER get me MORE than that and get those fingers a dialin' LOL b/c I am NOT a patient person when it comes to these things. And then he goes "But with THIS kind of thing I need to tell her face to face." Uh uh, just an excuse for me now!
Thanks for saying you are proud of me! It feels good standing up for myself. After all it is MY life and I have to protect MY heart. :)
~Megita :o)
I think you deserve someone who is going to give their full attention to you - not just part of their attention. Then again I think the majority of us posting about our Hispanic drama (me included) deserve better. Why do we put ourselves through this mess? If he doesn't love her - it should be easy for him to be truthful with her. I don't mean to be negative Megita but ........ how many times has this man lied to you already?
Yes, I agree and you are right. I think I am going to give him a deadline to tell her. Not sure yet though.
Exactly! If he DOESNT love her and she DOESNT love him, then what's the problem?
I AM THINKING...that he is married and he's going down there do DIVORCE her and if I EVER found out THAT was the case...it will be "Adios mentiroso" for SURE!
I don't know WHY we put ourselves through this mess! I've been thinking of you, how are you doing?
Time will tell with ALL our situations, won't it? :/
Stand your ground - She deserves to know. If he doesn't want to be with her, he should be able to call her and tell her such. That's awesome that you're standing up for yourself!! Go you!!! :)
I hope he calls her. You're very right - she should know. Its only fair. Don't take his excuses. Stand your ground!!
Yup! I'm standin' it! lol She DOES deserve to know. I told Cele, listen you've gotta choose. He told me he doesn't want to abandon his kids...umm I understand THAT and I told him he doesn't have to! He just needs to tell her BEFORE he goes back to Mexico! I'm NOT waiting a YEAR OR MORE until he goes back for him to tell her THEN! NO WAY!!
I hope he calls too. Sure it is not fair to me, but it really is not fair to her either. She should know and I told him he's got to decide what he's gonna do because I was la otra mujer cuando estaba con ese tipo, that 41-yr old José and I am SURE as heck NOT doin' it again! :/
~Megita :o)
My best friend is going through this same sorta thing right now...this is her first Novio Mexicano, and she fell for him hard and fast! He says he and his wife split up a few years ago...I'm not so sure about that though! She keeps asking me for my advice...I don't know what to tell her!
I am really glad you're standin your ground...and she DEFINITELY has the right to know about you! Him telling her now is the respectful thing to do for everyone invloved...that way EVERYONE can go thier merry little ways! ¡Buena Suerte, Chica! I know this has got to be tough for you!
~Jenn;0)
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